Of Mice and Men

     I doubt anyone would argue that we live in 'interesting' times.  A time full of political correctness, terrorist threats, and really sucky presidential candidates.  And as I look through all of the news feeds, all of the internet memes and jabs, I have to wonder: why are the mice in charge? 
     Let's look at the profiles: Mice run from what they fear, keep to the shadows, lash out when they feel threatened and cornered, and squeak a lot in fear as well.  They are generally known as timid creatures.  Men, on the other hand, display bravery in spite of fear, are courageous enough to stand for what is right, remembers that we are the dominant species on this earth, and yet are humble enough to care for and do right by those around us and less fortunate than us.  
     There are plenty of both mice and men in our society, but it seems we have come to a time when the mice are in charge and squeaking louder than the men.  These mice come in the name of peace, relying on their timid nature to carry them through, and soothing people by avoiding confrontation as much as possible.  But now those mice need a reminder that they're not the top of the food chain.  These mice wish to speak out and shame the men for being men.  It hasn't solved anything.  Our country needs men to lead it, not mice.  Men are mature, mice are child-like.  Men make tough choices and stand by them, while mice run and appease all they can. 
     Our country used to be run by men, but now these mice have made us victims. We are the prey.  And the longer we let the mice lead the charge, we will be easy prey.  It's time to let our men lead again; not to show our dominance, but to be humble stewards of the world and all of its peoples and creatures.

Love's Pain

How can I show you all that I see?
Let you feel what it means to be free?
How can I give you my eyes for the night?
And show you the joy that lives in the light?
How can I quiet your tempesting fears?
How can I do more than wipe away tears?
How can I stop the pain that you feel?
What will it take to get you to heal?

Educational Coffee

     We've all heard the phrase "coffee will stunt your growth" at some point in our lives.  If you haven't, then believe me--it's something that people have said.  Now I don't know if it's a proven fact or some ingenious ploy of a mother who didn't want her kids hyped up on caffeine.  My 5'2" frame can't say anything for it either--my height was locked in for years before I started drinking coffee myself.  But regardless of its integrity, I'd like to propose that our education system in America today is being fed 'educational coffee,' and stunting our children's growth.

     I can basically sum up my discussion in two phrases: idealism without reality is simply fantasy, and those who are not educators should not try to tell those who are how to do their jobs.  Now before any offense is taken, allow me to unpack my statements and explain where exactly I'm coming from.

     First, a little background about me: I started out as an Elementary Education major before switching to an English major.  I essentially left the education side of things because of my second statement.  After three years of education classes, I could see there was a dramatic gap between what and how teachers are taught to teach and how a typical modern-day elementary class is structured.  I knew that I would not be able to adapt well to that gap, so I switched to a major that better reflects my talents and interests.

    That gap does, however, give me a great lead-in to unpack that second statement by.  I'd like to set the stage with a story.  My roommate's aunt teaches third grade, but this year is going to look vastly different from what she's been used to.  Recess has been cut.  Not simply reduced, but cut completely.  It's gone.  A classroom full of 8- and 9-year-olds will no longer have a chance to run and play outside.  Why?  Because the powers-that-be in education have decided that it needed to go to make way for more instruction time.  The teachers are to work in 'brain breaks' and stimulate situations where students interact with one another, but the primary focus is given to having 90 minutes of instruction for both math and reading.  

     Here are the problems I see with that scenario: firstly, they are kids.  They need time to run around.  Being cooped up like that all day will quickly make them stir-crazy, in turn driving each other, and the teacher, crazy.  Crazy environments do not allow children to learn.  So the first lesson: children are not mini-adults.  They cannot be made to sit still for that long and be expected to learn anything.  Anyone who has ever had kids or have worked with kids can tell you that.  The second problem with having zero recess time is that children don't have the opportunity to naturally learn how to interact with one another.  Where did we all form those first friendships that lasted all through school?  On the playground.  By taking away recess, we may be severely crippling our young students' ability to socially interact with their peers.  

      Recess isn't the only thing that is being edged out of our children's education experience.  In schools across the nation, the time budgeted for art, music, and physical education is also shrinking.   Schools used to be able to proudly say that they provide a liberal education experience, but can that statement apply anymore?  With more and more attention given to classroom instruction, I see our educational vision narrowing.  Lesson number two: children learn differently from one another; each mind is unique.  Gardener's Multiple Intelligences speaks to that fact, and is one of the things that teachers are taught.  The idea should be a 'duh' concept.  Some people (and children) have natural gifts and talents in one direction, while others might have talent and natural ability in another.  Without learning art, music, or physical education, students may not have the opportunity to discover and foster those natural talents, or connect the perspective that they gain from them to what the classroom is teaching.  Some minds need to approach things in creative perspectives, while others need to be more logical or analytical.  Therefore, taking away outlets for different approaches can really hinder a student's ability to process information.

     These two lessons are the biggest ones that I would like the powers-that-be in education to recognize.  They are, in my opinion, fundamental to a well-rounded, successful education.  So that is where my statement of those who are not educators should not tell those who are how to do their jobs comes in.

     There is another side of this that has a major impact on today's education structure, and that was summarized by my statement that idealism without reality is only fantasy.  Let me explain that a bit.  The big shove towards a focus on reading and math comes from the desire to improve those abilities in students.  There is a gap between where the average skill level for those is and where it should be.  Ideally, if we give extra attention to those skills, the average ability level should increase.  There are all kinds of tests to measure that, put in place to ensure that students are reaching the skill level that is expected of them.  Realistically, classroom instruction spends a vast majority of its time trying to prepare students to do well on those tests.  Realistically, kids learn differently, so reading and math come easier to some than to others.  The fantasy is that we can get all students to an advanced skill level in math and reading without extra help outside normal classroom instruction.  The reality, however, is that we are actually lowering the average skill level by doing that.  If we don't give students with natural ability the chance to truly soar in those skills, they cannot help to raise the average.  Likewise, some students need extra help to master those skills, and the time for that should not and cannot be taken from regular classroom instruction without negative consequences.

     Coffee is delicious, but it can stunt your growth.  The same is true of education.  All those ideals sound pretty good, but those unrealistic ideals are stunting the growth of our students.  We want them to be able to reach for the stars, but that's pretty hard when we're leaving them short.

The Rain Dance

     It was magical, the plain and simple kind of magic.  The kind a quiet evening can bestow.  Just sitting there, tea in hand, cat beside, and the sky dripping a soft, steady drip.  The light dripping grew faster for a moment, then subsided once more.  A few seconds later, the fresh scent of mint wafted on the breeze, with that wonderful wet earth smell hard on its heels.  Both were swallowed up as the rain again fell harder.  Ebbing and flowing, the sound was nature's lullaby.  Small bits of thunder and lightning would make their presence known here and there, but not enough to frighten.
     Watching the rain splash upon the pavement was almost like watching a dance.  A waltz turning into a swing, a quick spin out to be next met with a moment of quiet intimacy.  The dancers spinning and swirling again, movement everywhere, building to a crescendo.  At its peek, the dancers slow to a loving waltz again, catching their breath, enjoying each other's company.  
     It was an invitation to join the dance; I nearly did, but my unfinished mug held me back.  The wind accepted the invitation, however, adding to the dance its orchestra music.  Excited by this new development, the dancers quickened their pace.  All thought of a quiet waltz was abandoned, as the the speed was ever increased.
     Soon it was no longer a dance but a wild frenzy.  The sight before me looked very much like our own personal Midwestern hurricane had come to spoil the dance.  Thunder and lightning crashed and cracked, louder and more frequent than it had been before.
     That, and my now-empty mug of tea, were my cues to go back inside, and off the front porch.  The cat stayed where he was, and presently the rain stopped.  The orchestra ceased their playing, and the dancers all went home.  As the darkness of night fell upon their stage, they promised to come and dance again.

The Marketplace of Free Ideas

     "I have an opinion.  It's a valid opinion too, because all opinions deserve equality in their acceptance.  So I want you to listen to my opinion, accept it, and hey--I expect you to automatically love everything about it.  What's that?  You have an opinion you want to share with the Marketplace of Free ideas too?  Great!  Wait--your opinion is a traditional one that goes completely against my opinion? Then sit down and shut up.  You're not allowed to have an opinion.  We don't want to have any bigots or haters here."

     I see scenarios like this happening day after day in our society.  True, it's never stated as bluntly as that, but in essence, the above is what it boils down to.  This argument has been used for centuries and for many different topics.  One of the most current issues is that of an acceptance and embracing of a gay lifestyle. 
     I personally cannot support a LGBT life choice/style.  I hold to a traditional view of marriage, one that has its roots in the Bible and a Christian faith in God.  Plain and simple.  That's how I view relationships.  But a view like that is met with such hostility now.  "It's people like you who would have us living in the Dark Ages!  You're just full of hate, and you're teaching your children to be full of hate too!"  That's the general response to a view like mine.  The only reason this response holds any clout is because it works from a lot of misconceptions.
     Misconception # 1:  Tolerance.  Society's acting definition of tolerance is that only the popular, mainstream ideas can be accepted and encouraged.  Anything else has no place, and must be shut down immediately.  True tolerance is recognizing differences, and working together peacefully despite those differences.  It's like we tell our young children:  You may not agree, but share/work together/play nicely anyway.
     Misconception # 2:  People ARE their actions.  The two can't be separated.  But we know that's not true.  An occasional beer does not an alcoholic make.  Nor is smoking or drug abuse necessarily life-long difficulties.  A night owl may still have to wake up early for work.  Bottom line--our actions are the results of our choices, and as such can be modified.  
     Misconception # 3:  Faith is for those who lack reason.  To say that there are no intelligent people who have a saving faith in Christ is ridiculous.  I know a lot of smart people who not only believe in the message of the Bible but have also put in quite a few hours into the study of what they believe.  Yes, sometimes it appears like science and the Bible are at odds, but science still has many unsolved mysteries to it.  We really DON'T know everything.
     There are other misconceptions involved, but many can be tied back to these three.  And after (or sometimes even before) these misconceptions can be dealt with, someone always tries using the argument that claims truth is relative.  "What's right for you isn't what's right for me."  This argument, again ages old, is idiotic.  
     Nothing in this world actually works in a 'relative truth' fashion.  For instance, the average workday goes from 8:00 am to 5:00 pm, and employers expect their employees to comply to that.  Imagine this scenario:  "Mr. Boss, sir, I know that you pay me to come in at 8:00 and work till 5:00, but I feel like that's just not right for me.  So from now on, I'll come to work at noon and leave around 3:00.  But you can still pay me the same."  "Well, Mr. Employee, you are no longer required to come to work at all.  You're fired."  
     No matter how one might wish to live in a world where truth is relative, one cannot get away from absolute truth in this world.  (And for the record, there's no colonies of humans on other planets.  That's still science fiction.  Sorry.)  We see absolute truth in how our society works, and even in how the earth itself functions.  Math, for instance, is a major component of human life that is always absolute truth.  Under relative truth, I could argue that all grass always appears pink.  But science has told us that is impossible because of how the chloroplasts function in plant cells.   So no matter how you slice and dice it, truth is always absolute.  
     My general point to all of this is to highlight how the Marketplace of Free Ideas has become a huge joke, and maybe provide a little insight as to what the problems are and how they can be fixed.  Call me traditional and idealistic, but I'd like to see FREEDOM of speech restored to all before it's gone for good.  

The Pain Family

There's a family that came to visit
Nay, they came to stay.
Their presence follows me around sometimes
Their touch invading the every day.  
There's Father Pain, a big strong man, who carries a crushing weight. 
Mother Pain, a quiet woman, who permeates everything with melancholy.
Then Child Pain, so young yet, who comes on hot and fast, energy spiking and fading quickly.
They come 'round one by one, sometimes in pairs, sometimes by their three.
Their presence is unwelcomed, but how can they be asked to leave? 
How can these hospitable responsibilities be relieved?
They need another invitation, but not from this poor soul.
But that offer's already extended, I just need to let them go.

Vacant

I've been thinking a lot lately about friendships lost.  Here's the current results:

Vacant

You're dealing with a memory,
The friend you hug is not fully me.
The chains are loose, my heart's now free
To remember who you used to be.

I've let go, I've moved on
The bond we shared is no longer strong.
This plays out like a bad love song.
To stay the same just feels so wrong.

I've checked out, I can't wait forever.
Attached heartstrings I had to sever.
My endurance of the pain would last? Never.
My emotions just aren't that clever.

I'll still be around, I'll still care
But the friendship we had won't be there.
I'm not being mean, I try to be fair,
But now you'll know why when you don't find me there. 

Balancing the Equation

     Time together used to be golden but has since faded to a tarnish.  Neglect has let the dust settle, hiding the beauty of what had been.  Empty talk and promises do nothing to restore the shine.  Will this friendship see its splendor once again?  I don't know, but it takes two to make a pair.
     This endeavor takes equal effort: tipped scales do not a balance make.  Nor does a dry gas tank see the journey to its end.  Likewise, a few gallons will see the journey cut short when the tank runs out.  The question is Will you fill the tank before the journey is no longer there to take?
     Do you remember it?  That friendship, sitting there as it gathers dust?  Will you let it fade away?  Or will it see the light of day?

Weird Waters

Weird waters we are wading now,
worries thick and fast.
Will the current wash us by?
Would footing stay at last?
When will we stand upon the shore?
Where is the solid ground?
Winds of change, you stir us up,
why muddle answers we have found?
We wonder if the river narrows,
wonder when it calms.
When worldly wisdom meets its end
we look then to the Psalms.
With waters deep and waters cold
we call upon the Lord.
Weird waters wash around us,
but HE is our Eternal Shore.

Beautiful

You are beautiful, like the morning light in a little girl's eyes.  Your joy at life bubbling up, infecting those around you with its warm golden light, eradicating any trace of gloom.  Your laugh is melodious, harmonizing with every good thing in the world.  A sonnet couldn't do you justice, nor could Shakespeare himself capture your radiance.  You are cut from a cloth whose artistry is unfathomable, and your love and faith do well to show the glory of your Maker.  Yes you are beautiful, but the mere word is but a frail shadow of that which no tongue can describe.

Happy Tears

A deeper color, a flash of rosy shading.  The feeling of choked words as emotion rises up--raw, and fierce, and beautiful.  The feeling so powerful that the body knows not what to do.  Tears run down her cheeks, but they do not match the feeling inside.  The feeling is joy, so immense, that it threatens to stop the flow of breathing and the heart yearns to break free of its cage of bone.  These are the happy tears. 

My City of Stars

A small little place is where I grew up, with a few close friends at my side.  And on summer nights we'd walk the town, and watch the stars spread wide.  So numerous and beautiful, my soul was filled with awe.  We friends sung praise to the Maker of it all.  But then I moved to the city, and my stars were hidden from my sight.  At first I lamented, seeing this only as a plight.  The sky no longer had its familiar shine, and it felt like I had left my heart at home.  But as time went on, and the nights did pass, my heart began to roam.  so then came the time that I moved to a new small place, and the stars shone brilliant once more.  And as I sat there under those stars, I noticed something I hadn't before.  The stars were more numerous than I could remember.  But as I tried to take solace in those stars, they were as cold to me as a silent December.  I thought "Why?  How can this be?"  And as I sat there thinking, the answer came to me.  I had no need to seek solace in the stars now.  In the city, my stars weren't in the sky, but around me--that's how.

Gray Day

Outside my window, the storm rages on. 
Lightning flashes, thunder cracks.
Rain pours out onto everything it can
Soaking it, filling the world with gray.


Inside my heart, a storm rages too.
Flashes of anger, roaring frustrations.
Tears fall down and flood the eyes
Blinding me, filling my soul with gray.


Turmoil and tension, complete unrest.
Fears rising, the cries unkept.
Darkness surrounding and invading
Closing in, filling it with gray.


So dark, so cold, shrouded in gloom
my heart aches, it cries for light
Where went all the happy times?
Mourning now, I'm filled with gray.


No end in sight, so sign of light
no breath of day, just endless night.
But Time and God can end the storm
Breaking free, filling skies with day.


The weight is lifting, peace is returning
hope is shining, my heart yearning
Suddenly there is a light
Shining forth, filling me with day.


The storm is over, the gray is gone.
Colors richer, life fuller.
A time for healing this dry ground
Renewing it, filling it with day.


The soul is fresh, renewed once more
burdens emptied, joys again
After tension comes great release 
Peace reigns, I'm filled with day.  

Spray - Painted Trees

Trees painted red for the blood they cannot shed.
They die just the same, but do they feel pain?
Does the forest cry out as its members fall down?
Or was there no voice as they fell to the ground?

The trees do not speak but they still utter sound.
They creak and they moan, and they sway all around.
The wind rustles their leaves, the sound tickles our ears.
It leaves lasting impressions, some laughter, some tears.

Stone Walls

The walls were built up brick by brick, 
strong - without a crack.

Not to keep the feelings out, 
but to keep them in - without slack.

Too many roles to let the feelings show,
the heart no longer knows to go.

But time alone has worn the walls,
some cracks now do appear.

The heart soaks up the sun, 
its time outside draws near.

The Jeweler's Wares

            “Our jeweler is the best.  No one in the world can match his skill,” crowed Ruby to her friends.  “I was talking the other day to my new friend Diamond.  She’s from some other shop, and she said that she got sent here so that real perfection could be achieved.  She says that our Andy’s work is so legendary, people say that he creates all of us out of nothing.  Any time he makes one of us, we’re absolutely perfect, just the way he wants us to be.”

            “I heard,” cut in Pearl, “that he doesn’t even have to find materials to make us either.  He just goes into his workshop, and comes out again, with a new perfect gem in his hands.”

            “I love how each of us is made unique.  No cut is the same, no shape the carbon copy of the next one.  I can’t imagine how Andy can do it. He’s made so many of us, and has never used the same design twice.  Wow,” Emerald sighed contentedly.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Ladomar grimaced as he walked past the gems’ shelf.  They were at it again.  Talking about their favorite subject.  Andy.  It was all they talked about as they awaited their purpose.  It was always ‘Andy this’ and ‘Andy that’.   Ladomar was sick of it.  Everywhere he went, it was Andy’s name that he heard.  No one ever mentioned his name; no one talked about who was always in Andy’s shadow.  Everyone forgot that Andy had an assistant.  Ladomar thought that even Andy himself forgot now and then.  He tried to tune out what the jewels were saying as he went about his work in the shop, cleaning up, straightening everything, making it all perfect.  But no matter how he tried to drown out the jewels’ voices, their words were always grating against his ears.  And the worst of it was that it was all true.  There was no one who could even come close to claiming the skill that Andy possessed.  Ladomar still had no idea how Andy was able to create so many unique, perfect pieces.  In all his years working for him, Ladomar still hadn’t learned the secret.  And that’s what cut the deepest.

            At first, he was content to remain in the shadows, was thrilled to be so close to the one who could do so many fantastic things.  He had been in utter awe of Andy.  But as time went on, he got used to the wonders, until they ceased to be wonderful to him.  He began hoping that Andy would start treating him like an apprentice, start teaching him how to make such wonderful jewels.  But with each passing day, Andy kept up his work, saying only a few words to Ladomar, and never invited him into his private workshop.  Ladomar had even tried bringing up the matter to Andy, and ask him to teach him.  But on every occasion, Andy had walked by preoccupied, not hearing him, or had not answered the question, and one time told him a solitary “No.”  Ladomar couldn’t believe it.  He had worked for Andy for so long, and had asked for nothing else, and Andy wouldn’t even teach him?  All Ladomar wanted was to be as great of a jeweler as Andy was.  Surely that wasn’t too much, right?  He deserved the chance to be Andy’s apprentice.  Assisting him just wasn’t enough.  So Ladomar began to feel resentment against Andy, began to hate the sound of his name, began to long for the day when his name would be praised just as highly- no, higher- than Andy’s name.

            So here he was again, running the jewel shop, hearing the gems go on and on about their maker, and still no closer to becoming a great jeweler himself than he had been on his first day.  He couldn’t take it anymore.  Ladomar waited until Andy left, and went into his private workshop.  He hoped, at the very least, that the room would hold all of the secrets of great jewel-making.  His whole being jittered with anticipation as he closed his fingers on the knob, turned the handle, and pushed open the door.  The room was black as he entered, and Ladomar fumbled around a bit before finding the light switch.  Finally, he could learn as much as Andy knew, and then he could leave, and start his own jewelry shop.  He could- …do nothing!  A single bulb lit up the room, revealing a wood floor and green walls.  Nothing was in that room.  Not even dust bunnies.  Ladomar couldn’t believe it.  He started looking around for a trap door.  There had to be something.  Surely Andy didn’t actually make the gems out of nothing.  There had to be a process that Ladomar could duplicate.  He had to be better than Andy.  He- … Ladomar turned back to the door at the sound of Andy’s return. 

            “What are you doing in here?” asked Andy.  His voice was calm, and his eyes told Ladomar that there would be no way out of this.  Andy already knew what Ladomar was going to say, already knew all the excuses that he could conjure up. 

            “I want to be as great as you.  Greater than you.  I can’t just be your assistant anymore.  I need to learn.”  Ladomar’s voice was defiant.

            Andy’s voice was kind as he replied, “Ladomar, you know I revere you highly.  I have put you in charge of running my shop, have given you the highest position.  But you cannot be like me.  You were brought in here to serve.  That is your place.  Please return to it.”

            “No!”  shouted Ladomar.  “I will not!  I deserve to be greater than you.  I’ve done so much for you!  I’ve heard your name be praised everywhere I go, and no one acknowledges my existence!  I’m tired of living in your shadow!  I deserve my own spotlight!”

            “Ladomar, please, calm yourself.  Return to your place.  Forget these desires for greatness.  Be great in what you have been called to do.”

            “No!”

            “Then I must ask you to leave.  I cannot allow you ruin this place with your attitude.” Andy was as calm as ever. 

            “Fine! I’ll leave!  But don’t ever expect me to come back!”  Ladomar stormed out of the little work room, and in his rage, threw around all of the beautiful gems Andy had made.  The gems cracked and broke into shards, and Ladomar threw most out onto the street.  He then went to go lick his wounds in the company of his friends.

                        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Sapphire was shy when she arrived at Andy’s shop.  The other jewels who were there were very helpful though.  They did not try to push her, didn’t try to get her to share with them her experiences.  So for the first few days, she just listened.  She heard Ruby talk about her experiences.

            “I remember that day.  I remember Ladomar suddenly went crazy.  He went into Andy’s private workshop, which no one is ever supposed to do, and he started yelling at Andy, saying he should be greater than him.  When Andy told him- nicely, mind you- to please go back to running the shop, he lost it.  He stormed out, and the next thing I knew, he had picked me up and thrown me across the room.  I hit the wall, crashed onto the floor, and saw pieces of me shattered around me.  It was so horrible.  I was broken.  Cracked.  No longer perfect, like Andy had made me.  But Andy fixed me.  He saw past all of my brokenness, and put me back together.  I still have a few scars, but I am whole again, because of him.” 

Ruby’s story was one of the better ones.  Some jewels had spent some time outside of the shop, like Sapphire had, but had gotten to be returned to the store sooner than she.  Their stories were similar to hers, but also similar to Ruby’s.  Topaz told of how he had seen Ladomar one day on the streets, and how he and the friends he had with him would come up to broken jewels, like him, and would try to tell them all these bad things about Andy, or would try to twist the truth into a lie.  Some jewels were young enough to believe Ladomar, and would then let themselves get more cracked and broken before they realized what was going on.  Other gems were wise enough to know the wholeness that Andy could give them, and slowly tried to work their way back into his shop.  None of them had made it on their own, though.  Topaz told of a few people who were loyal to Andy who had helped return them.  Topaz himself was still in the process of being made new.  He still had a giant gash going through him, and a small chip here and there muddled his outline, but he wasn’t completely shattered like Sapphire was. 

Some jewels refused to admit that they had a story.  They never wanted to see their own brokenness, never admitted to being completely shattered.  Garnett was one of those jewels.  “I am just fine the way I am, this is who I’m supposed to be,” she would declare haughtily.  “If Andy didn’t want me to be like this, he wouldn’t have let it happen,” she’d say with a sneer.  Each day, the gems could see a new piece of her cracking or chipping off. 

Other jewels focused too much on their brokenness.  All that they could think of was how they were chipped, cracked, gouged, and how they could do nothing to fix it.  They lived for the days when Andy would spend time with them, putting the pieces back, smoothing out the cracks.  But then they would return from his workshop and see only the pieces that were missing, the cracks that were not yet filled. 

As she herself went through the process of being made new, Sapphire looked at those around her and watched.  It seemed to her like there were three categories of gems.  The first category saw only the beauty of what Andy had done.  They didn’t bother to look at the imperfections, and they acted like they weren’t even there.  It was as if their view of life was zoomed out so far that they couldn’t see any details.  The second category saw only the flaws, but never looked beyond them to see the beauty of Andy’s creation.  These gems looked at life through a lens zoomed in. 

Sapphire loved the days when it was her turn to spend some time with Andy in his workshop.  He would talk to her, tell her that he loved her, and tell her that he had a special purpose for her.  And slowly, he started putting her pieces back together.  As she was being mended, she thought she belonged to the third category of gems.  She saw that she still had flaws and marks on her, but she could also see the beauty of what Andy was doing for her.  It was like she viewed life at the right spot- not too far away, and not too close.  Sometimes she would struggle with leaning towards one view or another, but after spending time with Andy, she got better at seeing the picture from the right distance.  For that, she thanked Andy, and praised him for his greatness.  She also hoped that the other gems could learn to see their lives through that lens as well.  She hoped that the gems would stop listening to the twisted lies that Ladomar told them, and would instead listen to what Andy had to tell them.  Sapphire loved having that perspective, and tried to share it with her friends as often as she could. 

Author’s Note

This story is a creative rendering of a true story found in the Bible, and of some of my own musings.  Because of this, there is a lot of parallelism between my story and the Bible’s account.  The part that is based on my own musings is how my mind creatively translated my thoughts of brokenness and how we are like Andy’s jewels.  Andy’s jewels can’t really do anything for themselves.  They’re incapable of fixing themselves, and must rely on Andy to do that.  There’s also a lot of meaning behind the names “Andy” and “Ladomar.”  Ladomar, of course, is based on Lucifer.  When I started thinking about writing this story, I wanted to pick a name that both started with an “L” and reflected on the character.  “Ladomar” is Hungarian, and means “trapper.”  Andy’s name isn’t quite as meaningful, but it is based on a reference.  There is a joke that goes: “Do you know God’s first name? It’s Andy.  ‘And He walks with me, And He talks with me, And He tells me I am His own.’  So since Andy is the God figure in this story, I thought it would be a fitting name for his character.

Dead Hawks Don't Fly

Alone in the sky
On silent wings
Looking at the world,
Thinking through things.


A forest spread out
Trees aplenty below
A turn in the sky
The turn silent and slow.


But out rings a shot
The sound rips through the air,
A feeling of falling
A boy's look of despair.


His unwanted prey 
Fell from the sky,
But despite what he did,
Dead hawks don't fly.

Chains

     They say that ignorance is bliss, and knowledge is the key to freedom.  But how true is that?  How free are we?  In ignorance, we are chained by the restrictions that come with it, and a lack of creative means, with no hope of moving forward.  But in knowledge we are also chained by the obligations and responsibilities that present themselves alongside our knowledge.  Can we really be free?  What is the balance of liberation?  To stay in ignorance is to deny oneself a meaningful life, but to forever be in pursuit of knowledge denies the chance of finding any meaning in life.  The only liberation, then, is to admit that one shall never know all that there is in life.  But does that signify defeat, and thus ignorance?  No.  The balance is found in a book.  A book that lays out what things can be learned, and what things will never be understood.  A 
book where life’s meaning is found on every page, every paragraph, every line, sentence and word.  A book written over the course of 2,000 years by 40 men, where every word was inspired by God.  Be free of the chains; liberation is never far away.

Stories

Stories: how powerful they are.  Cutting through to the very soul, leaving a raw and bleeding path in their wake.  Each line eliciting a new emotion, one that leaves the soul-bearer changed forever.  No more can the reader be innocent of the pain, love, insights or laughs that a single story can reveal.  Never again can the mind revert to its former self; forever changed, forever having entered a new awareness.  One can live a pretend life, as if unchanged, but somewhere, some time, perhaps in the dark of night or a weak moment, again will the story be brought to the forefront of the mind.  Inescapable, forever chained.  
Why can stories hold such power?  Simple words written on a paper.  But the force they wield can shape and hold sway over life and death itself.  Why?  A single voice penetrating, piercing.  Can mere words really be that affecting? 
So many have tried to control the power of words.  Some have caused unspeakable terrors, while others have shown love and encouragement, proclaiming the message they were given.  Still others merely flounder in a sea of words, their attempts at greatness falling by the wayside, soon to be swept away to make room for the new current.  
Stories.  A force so powerful, only one could, has, can, and will have complete control over it.  A force that bows to no one but its maker.  Only one man can claim that ownership.  A man called Messiah.  Prince of Peace.  King.  Lord.  Emmanuel.  Jehovah.  Yahweh.  Savior.  Redeemer.  Christ.  Son.  Jesus. … God.

Frustration

Sometimes I want to scream, to shout my furies to the world.  Oh why must life be such a stage, a dance, with a mask to wear and too many opportunities to make a wrong step?  For once, could there be no consequences for sharing completely who we are and what we feel?  Life is too short to tiptoe around subjects, but that's exactly what we do.  We are taught to live a certain way, and when we go against that grain, it is we who bear the brunt of if.
Not surprisingly, the source of my frustration is relationships.  This time, I'm having to deal with a friend of mine trying to set me up with a friend of hers. My tastes are completely different from this friend, yet she decided to try to hook me up anyway with a guy I don't know, have heard nothing about, and who now knows things about me.  What irks me the most, however, is that she didn't even ask me before thrusting this on me.  I feel like my personal life has been invaded somewhat, and it is something that I would never do to her.  Not without permission first.  There's also an eerie coincidence in it though.  All the guys whom I've had awkward relationship frustrations with have all had names starting with the same letter.  After this amount of time, I'm kind of wondering if it's a sign of some sort.
Now maybe I wouldn't mind as much if I felt I didn't have a chance with a certain someone else.  But the truth is, I may be starting to feel something for this guy, and I don't really know how to read him yet.  Maybe there's a chance, and I'm hoping there might be, but even if there doesn't come anything from it, right now I'd be okay too.  I just have to guard my heart, and hope I don't end up lying to myself.  I also wish I could go with the whole "no consequences" bit and just make my feelings known.  But again, there's a proper way to do things, and it could backfire otherwise.
I wonder though if I set my standards too high though sometimes.  The question is about where to draw the line, what to give or take.  I simply don't know.  And the not knowing is part of what frustrates me the most.  So here's basically my rant, and my scream, albeit one that does nothing to help situations.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!